I told my wife I loved her today.
But that was a lie.
In fact, I’ve been telling her the same damn lie for the past 53 years.
Truth is, after all these years, I’m still in love with you.
I watch my grandkids run around as they play.
But they are just the spawn of my fabricated lie.
Do I love my grandkids? Sure.
But I know that we would have had grandkids of our own too.
Decades ago you left me.
But I never bothered chasing you.
My pride wouldn’t let me.
I was more worried about damaging my ego than my heart then.
But I’ve come to regret that decision every night
Because there’s not a single night you don’t cross my mind.
I should have chased you.
I should have fought for you.
But now we both are living different lives.
We both are living false lives,
Because I know the life we should be living is where we die old together.
I chug this glass of whiskey
Because it is my only pain killer.
My only hope is that I end up with you in heaven,
Because life has been hell without you.
I pour another glass of whiskey to numb me.
There not enough liquor in the world for me to kill this pain.
But tonight I’m willing to prove myself wrong.
Even if it kills me.